Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Relinquish Control - 8/21/2013

As promised, I am writing again. I asked my girlfriend what a good topic to be was. She said caterpillars. We shall see. Either way, there is a story and a topic that will be based loosely on a story she shared with me about caterpillars.  Tonight though is more about relinquishing control of your life. Giving it to a higher power and just enjoying the ride.

“Be willing to relinquish the life you’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for you.”
– Joseph Campbell.

This lesson is one that really hits home lately. It’s one that has brought me so much more happiness than I could have anticipated. Isn’t our goal in life to have joy?

At the end of last year/beginning of this year my divorce was anticipated to be over.  Instead it took nearly 6 more months. I was getting really frustrated at the delay. There didn’t seem to be any reason for the delay and it was preventing me from moving on with my life.

I had dated for a bit but church teachings advised not to date until divorce was final and I made the decision to stop until the divorce was final. I waited...and waited. During that time I learned a lot. Finally I was comfortable with myself, something that had been missing for quite some time. Habits were built of reading positive things daily. Overall I was happy during that time.

Yes...there were the struggles with work. I needed to move on, I felt it, I knew it, but I was not willing to relinquish control. I wanted that stability, felt I needed it. It took several months for me to really start looking for work. Only a few days before I lost my job did I really start working with my current employer to get that job. At that time I relinquished control to God (that experience taught me something too which I’ll share in a bit).

When my divorce was finally complete mid May I wasn’t sure I wanted to date. Anyone that talked to me knew I had said I was going to start dating as soon as the divorce was over. I wasn’t sure that I was ready at that point.

One fateful evening I set up an account on match.com. To say I was a bit apprehensive about it was an understatement. Dating in my 30’s was bound to be a nightmare, so I thought.  Within a week I went on my first and only first date (been dating her ever since)!

Positive reading material all taught me that I needed to relinquish control so I gave in. In fear I let myself open my heart, way quicker than I could have ever planned. One experience that helped me open up was how supportive and positive she when I lost my job. That type of thing can really show how someone handles tough situations. She passed with flying colors J Every day I find something else that I love about her. She continues to be a support and a positive influence for me. I just hope that I can return as much as I receive. All this because I relinquished control!

During our time dating we have both been out of town for several weeks. It’s been difficult but each one of those trips has taught us something important. Starting out a new relationship I would never have planned to be apart. God has a plan...we can accept it and be happy, or we can be stubborn, unhappy, and fight our future. If I had been stubborn (which I usually am) and only let life go the way I planned I would never have met the most amazing woman in the world!

Being blessed so abundantly because I let God plan my life has been spectacular. When I say to I let God plan my life, yes I have but that doesn’t mean that I’ve just sat back and done nothing. Laziness doesn’t work. It’s not part of the plan. What is needed is for you to do your best and wait for the rest!  

Plan, work hard, and be ready to accept the changes as they come your way. You’ll be happier than you could ever be by relinquishing that control and letting yourself be happy and knowing that you did what was right for you. I wish only the best for each of you. Relinquish control, give God the reigns and know that even in challenges you are better off. I leave you with a few positive quotes that remind you to relinquish control, enjoy the moment and know there is a better future for you!

“An Arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. When life is dragging you back with difficulties, just imagine that it’s going to launch you into something great”

“Accept – then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it…This will miraculously transform your whole life.”
–Eckhart Tolle

“Don’t make the mistake of waiting for your life to be sorted before you start having a good time. Get out there and enjoy yourself. When you start fully engaging with your life right where you are, you’ll become energized, and so will your life.”
- Jackee Holder


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